Come Back ..

Time: You can’t tell but it’s something near 4 Am

Location: you will never know but it’s somewhere in the sea very near to current Egyptian Alexandria

Date: Things like date are meaningless at this time but you can say it’s like 30.000 years ago

Darkness, Mediterranean in his most wild moments, wind and harsh coldness, chillness is the name of the game, while it seems like it covers life itself, yeah, welcome to the Alexandria nobody had ever seen.

Today is the day, they told us so, that’s why you can see me now laying beside Leontina, she is afraid, I wish I could make her feel better but it’s hard while I can’t make myself any better

We were laying on this small island in the sea, we still watching and waiting for long time, it’s about 20 mins swimming from the beach, sigh is hard in this dark world, and the cold mist is making it worst, scared, feeling cold, we are barely wear something, we were the only who had guts to go that near to the ship, it’s hundreds of miles away, but even in this dark and mist you can see it staying there in the middle of the sea, it had been there for a number of days greater than my ability to count, surrounded by glowing lights so that it seems in this mist like a real monster coming from and old era

Today is the day, they should hit us any moment from now, it’s scary and exciting when you stay there and watch the end of the world, you suppose to defend your city, your world and your whole life, but it’s not the time for being hero, I know now that there are a lot of things that we can’t stand, and I looked at her eyes, the beautiful Leontina, it’s hard to believe that may be tonight is the last night I will see her or touch her, and it’s killing me that look in her eyes begging me to do something, I wish I could .. I wish

We were the only survivors, the city is fall down, and when the ship started to move forward, I felt those butterflies on my stomach, our world is over, and the new era of darkness is one day away from starting, I know that me and Leontina will move forward beyond the sea, we are going to move to the north, to the land of ice, swimming from Mediterranean to the north is impossible, I know that me and Leontina won’t make it to the Saqqaq  lands, but I told her this is fate, we are not going to die, we are immortals, and the journey will continue until we reach our goal, we are going to start the journey  as Leontina and Vergil, tomorrow we will go on as an unknown sea creatures, and may be when we reach the Saqqaq we will be a crossing light over the sky, no one will know about us, maybe someday when we get our world back, we will teach every one of those creature the real story, every time I look to their stupid faces, scary tallness, their black short hair and their auraless bodies, I got that those whom called Adams will ever understand the story, but no matter what, the only true fact is that one day we will take our city back, our world, and we will always be around, in all shapes, and in some day, when the great Cthulhu make his last wake, you will know the truth

And now dear Leontina, take my hands, and let the journey start

My name is Vergil, and I came to stay

Come back…

June 12, 2012 | Categories: Ninety Four | 2 Comments

I Walked Alone ..

Only if good people stop falling in love with… Sluts

January, and the year 2012

Tallinn was kind to me…

I was staying in front of the door at this early  hour of the morning, I was mind clear, cold  and little tired, sleet made life better and better at this time .

I can’t control my mind, and I can’t control what to think about, so I found myself thinking about escaping, less than 2 years, it’s not something am proud to remember, and I used to hate stucking in dirty stories even if the joystick was on my hands, but to the natural bad ass inside it was a brand new experience to be like that, it’s really easy to attract good girl, and It’s hard like hell to get a whore’s attention

Anyway I can’t help it now, or later, but that’s what I was thinking about when I decided to read the mail again, that mail, and I remembered Peter, and after all what I went through it still making me not okay when to know that someone got hurt and got his life destroyed for something he has nothing to do with, he wasn’t a close friend, I can barely call him a friend, but I used to know that I have that train neighbor inside which made me trustable for no reason

Whatever, I opened that doc again and read it once and twice, too sad and really hurts, if it wasn’t me I would never believe what happened to him, but I know better than anyone how may a person be the worst enemy for himself, he was in love, and he did what lovers used to do, life was good, life was great, and I seems nothing will make this fail

If you were a girl, then you know well how does it feel when you got humiliated by something you did in love, I know better than anyone too, you are in love, you did things in the name of love, love ended, and you may face the consequences of being too naïve to gave it all under love’s flag, you know as a girl it hurts, but you don’t know that it hurts 10 times more for the one you loved, when it came from another third person, I think we all know this, nothing new

But the real sick thing when it related to secrets that only both of you know, WHAT! did you tell your friend ? Did I made it for you and know am doing it for thousands on the web, then you realized that it’s not him!! , weird? I know, it seems like when you wake up in the morning in your dark room and get a cup of water, and when you just finished you get a call telling you drinking water after waking up is not healthy!! What the fuck!! , it may be a nice idea for a horror movie or you may be your under control of an astral projector, but real life is not that fantasy, when you walk in the jungle under the moon on mid month it’s more than 99% percent that you will go home safe and you will not meet a werewolf !

It was the start, and I still reading, after we knew that, and now we sure that it wasn’t you and it wasn’t her and since that we are sure that what is you receiving is something you didn’t tell or show any one, so let’s see the odds, if it were before Jan 25th 2011 I would tell you that it’s something related to the fucking dismantled state security, but it’s not logical, yeah they are a group of fucking gay ass mother fuckers and they may do this and worst, but their lived are complicated enough, they may do this for have fun not to threat you, so we only have the last and the most realistic odd, exactly, a web hacker

I know you became aware, she sent you a pic and 5 mins later she received it from that address! Just 5 mins! it seems like this hacker is doing nothing but watching you 24/7m well don’t send me pics, but making no sense, every word you type is getting its way to her immediately !! , well let’s not talk online , and when you felt it’s embarrassing in Egypt to ask for police help, you decided to bring a private sniper, a trustable one, to help you to know who is this, and all you can do is waiting and go on with your miserable life, until that night when the phone rings

–       Hey , away ya Peter

–       Away ya  …. Azyk 3amla ayh

–        3amla zeft b2a anta bet3ml kda w ana aly knt mesad2ak !

–       Fy ayh bas ana 3amlt ayh

–       Ana gatly call delwa2ty 7alan, al hacker beta3ak 3erf mnyn anna 7anet2abel blyl ?

–       N3m !!

–       Rod 3alya 3erf mnyn anna 7anet2abl blyl

–       Ya … lesa fy et7mal kbyr asasn ano hacking 3alyky anty msh 3alya ana ba3ml aly b2dar 3alyh !!

–       Fe3lan ? anta msh wa5ed balk wala betstahbel? A7na ma2olnash dy fy al pc wala fy al mobile a7na olnah anhrda al sob7 w a7na sawa, w maknsh 7ad feh 3’erna , ana w anta w rabna bas aly 3arfyn anna 7nt2abel anhrda blyl, maho ya ema ana aly kalmt nafsy w olt lha, ya ema al hacker kan a3ed b2a gwa shantety w ana msh wa5da baly

–       E2fly ya ….

–       Msh afla ana 3ayzha afham azay 3mlt kda w 3ayz a mn kda

–       Olt lk e2fly

–       Anta 7ayawan w zebala

–       …. ? anty bt2oly ly kda ! aloo …. !!

Shock and confusion, but the real feel inside, was fear, yeah, you afraid to say it, the truth is taking her panties slowly and you are afraid of what you expecting to see, some days earlier you were mostly realized that it wasn’t about hackers or cops, and you are barely breathing, your heart beats loud and fast like a metal band drums, Jesus.. Help me!!

I admit that my heart start to hurt as this point, when you see things is going to change forever, and u can’t do anything but closing your eyes to avoid watching, it was that night when your private sniper called you, and asked you to meet him in the night

–       A ya m3lm

–       Azyk ya Peter ayh al a5bar

–       Tamam tamam oly 3erft 7aga

–       Mmmm , msh 3aref

–       Msh 3aref ayh 3erft wala msh 3erft omal klmtny lyh ?

–       Bos ya Peter, hwa anty mawgod fy al shabka m3 7ad ?

–       Al net asdk ? la manta 3aref ana lewa7dy malysh fy 7ewar al waslat da ana lewa7dy

–       Mot2aked an ma7dsh ma3ak wala mewasl le7ad wala 7ad 3amal hach 3ala al shabka beta3tk ?

–       Ya 3m enta ahbal 7akon mewasl le 7ad w nasy !! w ba3dyn hack ayh ana al router 3andy wire msh wireless, engaz allah yekrmk

–       Tyb bos, bema an al msgs kant btro7 le … ba3d ma teb3atha lyha b 5 mins, awel ma teb3atha t2om gaya lha mn al mail al tany, olt a7sn wa2t any akon online w enta online, ana olt lk kda w adytk al patch 3ashan ashof your pc w anta a3ed , bas al moshkela any la2yt 3andak al 7emaya gamda awy ! tol ma anta on ana msh ader ad5ol 3alyk, mosta7el, mn al a5er mosta7el hacker ye3rf yed5ol 3alyk, w anta mn al awel 3aref an mafysh 7ad ye2dr ye3ml hacking 3alyk 3ashan 3andak protection bnt 7aram malhash 7al, bas anta fedlt 7awaly youmin kda msh betban, fa ana 5at al mail aly byb3at kol 7aga le … w adyto le wa7d a3rfo yet3aml ma3ah kda w yshof, 3amlo add, w estnah lama b2a on, w kalemo w tb3an w hwa bykalemo kan sha3’al 3ala al gehaz 3ando 3ashan yewsal le ay 7aga, oly hwa anta nazlt windows aw ay 7aga oryb ?

–       – ah ambate7 nazlt windows eshm3na

–       3ashan kda ya m3lm

–       Aly hwa ayh b2a ?

–       Anta 3’aleban nazlt windows w msh nazlt b2a al security stuff beta3k, nazlt windows w sebt al pc w 5alas, 3ashan kda lama al wad sa7by add al mail w 7awel yed5ol 3alyh la2ah 3ady 5ales w da5al b sohola

–       Msh fahem !

–       Hwa gably kol 7aga

–       Kol al details beta3t al mails

–       Msh al password wala al 7agat dy ya3ny dol kano kolhm nos sa3a aly kan fyhm on w maknsh byrod 3alyh

–       Omal ?

–       Hwa bas edr ye3rf hwa da5el mnyn , al address beta3o w edaholy w aly sa7bak msh odamo ela ano yebal’3 al police w 5alas ana 3erft al address number, bas tb3an al details aly 3n sa7eb al address number esmo b2a w sakn fyn w kol da al sherka bas beta3t al net aly te2dr te3rfha ,, w tb3an msh bydo al details dy le ay 7ad , so msh odamo ela ano yebal’3 al police

–       Police ayh bas

–       Ana ma2oltlksh e3ml kda, ana be basata 5at al address da w karento b 7aga, faker lama sa2ltk fy al awel 7ad ma3ak fy al shabka ? w olty ly la2

–       Ah

–       Kan 3ashan a2olk ano al address aly kan byb3at le … al 7agat dy hwa hwa al address bta3k ..

–       …………………………………..

–       Ana zyk msh 3aref sara7a ,, bt2ol ma7dsh ma3ak 7ad fy al shabaka w al router wire msh wireless, ya3ny al e7tmal al wa7yd ano aly sewar btwesal le … mn nafs al pc aly anta a3ed 3alyh

–       Mmmmmm

–       Oly, hwa dymn kant al sewar betwsalha w anty a3ed ? ya3ny awel ma teb3atlk 7aga aw tklmk kant betwsalha mn al mail al tany 3ala tol ? wala kan sa3at by7sal anha betwsalha w anty msh on ?

–       Ah 7aslt ktyr anha kant betb3at ly 7aga blyl then tetb3tlha tany youm al sob7 aw al dohr

–       Al  hacker may2drsh ye3ml kda, ana fahm ano mmkn ye3ml kda w anta online la2no tol ma anta fate7 ur pc hwa a3ed gwah , anma azay 7ya5od 7aga mno w anta aflo asln ??

–       ………………………………..

–       Bos ana 3amlt aly a2dar 3alyh bas al akyd ano msh hacker, da 7ad using ur pc w byb3at mno kol da, ah al hacker ye2dar ye3mlha w anta on, anma lama olt kan by7sal w anta msh on asln wala fate7 al pc yeb2a b basata mafysh hacker

–       Omal fyh 3afryt

–       Ma3rfsh b2a bas al akyd b nesbt 100% ano al 7agat kant betwsal le … mn ur pc, mn nafs al pc aly anta a3ed 3alyh, shof b2a lw a5ok wala abok wala 7ad sa7bk a3ed ma3ak

–       7ad sa7by a3ed ma3aya w ana online 3ala al pc w byb3at 7agat mn mail tany w ana a3ed online mn nafs al pc, mmmmmmmmmm

–       Ya3m ma3rfsh ana olt lk aly weslt lo, kol 7aga kant bettb3t mn ur pc, bas 5elst shaklk asasn bet7awar w anta aly ba3tha ya abn al mara,

–       Lol, mashy ya m3lm, ta3btk ma3aya

–       La wala yehmk shof bas anta al donya fyha a

–       Aly y3ozo rabna , yala salam ana lazm amshy delwa2ty

–       Salam ya 7ag Peter

This was the last words in the doc, I closed it and u start to think again, when I received this mail about 9 months ago, it contains this word document and headlined with one sentence ‘I gone crazy, I knew I did it”

I don’t know when and how do schizophrenia hit a man, and though I didn’t know more than what’s was in the doc, but I can see clearly what happened, he left his sniper, and gone home, he knew that his fears came true, and he thought that this only happen in movies, a Peter loves, and another Peter destroying, yeah, after all life is more fantasy than fantasy itself, and he was sure now that if he went to the jungle, he will meet the werewolf, he didn’t know is it a matter of time before some Peter take control ? He knows now that he sends her what she sends him, so did him sent it to another people? Did he share it? and if he log into another porno site, will he find her pics and videos under a topic like a hot Egyptian girl striping, in this moment he must started crying, I am sure he did, not just because I start to feel my eyes wet, but because I knew what does it feel, he got destroyed, and he destroyed the girl he loved, she will never forgive him, even if she knew the truth, she won’t feel safe again with him, she will always be threat every single moment she talk to him, she won’t understand, and the bad thing that really hurts that he won’t let himself hurt her anymore, she would be more safe if she was with a vampire in the night, it’s done, and it’s over …

I stood up and start walking around the home, it’s killing when we got hurt with things we can’t control, poor Peter, it was March last year when you sent me this, and since that I didn’t see you, actually no one did , you just disappeared and you haven’t been seen since that day, I don’t know where are you now, and I don’t know if you are safe now, or doing well, I don’t know if you started as a new person in another place, actually I don’t know if you are alive, and it seems like I will never know, and your sad family won’t too

You decided to take all the pain, I didn’t know why did you sent me this, should I tell her, I didn’t, and I know that’s what you really wanted, it would be easy for her if she remember you as a bastard jerk, I know she won’t take it if she knew that you are not that man she though, and you decided to hurt yourself to let her live in peace and feel happy again, I don’t know about her anymore, but I can see her with someone else, and of course she forgot you, my heart still hurts for you, everyone is sad for you, but if you are still in this world, I know that you are happy for her now, that’s what you wanted, and I think you get it, And I think I made the right decision, but I will pray that everything well be okay again, and I will always be proud that I knew you ..

June 4, 2012 | Categories: Ninety Four | 6 Comments

GOD In Rain .. !!

And night secrets, music even RAIN, are completely insipid without you…

And just like Andy Dufrense , and you will get old thinking that you are the pure example of forgiveness and Spiritual peace.

Most of lover can’t talk about love without mentioning the word “Heart”, yeah it’s okay and we all used to hear this, sometimes you meet those idiot who are trying to act like different and dangerous, mentioning the same stupid example: actually we think that heart is only a machine to pump blood from and into all the body, yeah we are realistic and we are awesome!! , but the fact which proved by many scientists that people in love lives longer that other “realistic idiots”

It’s the same thing about forgiveness, no one will ask you to sacrifice, and actually all your services as a forgiver are no longer required, and only now I dare to say that I believe that forgives and revenge are simply two faces for one coin, and when you toss a coin you will simply get only one face, you can’t have both!! Just like the strap you can keep it as long as you holding it, and once you let it be, it moves automatically to the other partner

That’s how I got 90% of my dreams come true, you can hold this strap forever because I get enough, Andy Dufrense said that hope is good, it’s the best thing and good things won’t die, bet he forget to say that it’s only in good worlds and with good people

Yeah, I found myself on the other face of the coin, you can go on with your forgiveness, and let me be the bad guy, and let me be happy again

Illinois, wait for me …

December 6, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 63 Comments

One Life .. A Mi Manera !!

You know that i love you

And I know that you tried hard to make my happy, for long time

And i want to make you happy as well

But now, it’s not about courtesies or favors

It’s a lifetime, it’s about forever

I know i am letting you down now

But i can’t make you happy on my expense

And you have to get used to this

Am Sorry .. One Life .. One Signle Shot

November 29, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 4 Comments

Goodbye Judy

January 11^th 1991

November 15^th 2011

Rest in Peace

November 16, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | Leave a comment

Real Life .. Door Is Closing !!

When he dreamed that she had sex with someone else , he gone crazy , he didn’t know what to do, so he picked a fight with her , trying to let her feel herself as a bitch, while she were only in his sick dream .

And when he dreamed that she had sex with someone else for the second time, he realized that there is something wrong about their relationship, that’s why he saw her in such shameful situation in his dream, he tried to figure out what is wrong, tried to fix something broken

And when he dreamed with her in the same situation for the third time, he didn’t take much more time to realize that it’s more than just a dream, not sure if he should call her a whore, but it’s too late anyway, but the only thing that’s real is if he just followed her heart from the beginning , he would saved a lot of pain and non-answering questions, the only real thing was that the truth bring herself to him from the 1^st time, but he refused to believe, he preferred to fool himself, at once “Steven King” said that the truth won’t hold on against interesting stories , that’s why he can’t  take the truth and scarify the awesome moments, and now he should face the consequences,  and he should pay, again

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And once we talked about facts don’t hold on against funny stories, we might talk now about the funny stories that were to funny to real, we love to believe what’s amazing rather than what’s real, but sometimes we decide to refuse some facts because they can’t be real even if they were to funny, our little narrow can’t believe that there are a lot of things that we don’t know, some people  still believe that dragons didn’t exit on Earth, I want to see their faces when they know that  dragons did exist on earth and they still are !! Yeah dragons didn’t extinct yet, simply you can  google “The Comodo Dragon” and be ready for the shock!!

Once again when we talk about the amazing stories that we can’t believe that they are real, we must mention the Brothers Grim, if you don’t know them you can remember Cinderella and Snow white and you might remember him, but know we         may talk about one of the most amazing stories in the history, we are talking   now about “The Pied Piper” the most famous children story, of course we all remember the poor piper who came into a very poor village in Germany to find the mice everywhere, on the land, under the trees, in houses and even in the water crocks, so he decided to help them, he bring his pipe, and start to play and walk through the village, of course we know that mice came out to follow him from everywhere, village’s people didn’t believe that they had this huge number of mice in their village, anyway we know that he lead them to the bridge and when he passed it, the mice follow him while the bridge start to fall down under the pressure of the heavy weight of this huge number of mice, the mice are gone and the people were happy and thanked the piper and everyone lived in a lifetime happiness, well , that’s the story we know, or we can say that’s Grim brother decide to tell us, and of course no one knows that this story is real like you and me, but this is not the issue, the main issue that did the Grims say the whole truth? The answer is no, they just mentioned the nice part of the story, but they ignored in purpose the other half of the story, the terrible half, he didn’t mention that the piper agreed to help the people in the village in return of 10 golden coin, The Grims wrote the end after the mice dies, but the real story that after the piper attract all the mice with his pipe that contain some tone attracts animals, he return to the village to ask for the 10 golden coins, and as usual you won’t pay for something you have already got, the piper said nothing, but he was planning for a revenge bigger than a few bad words, he stayed in the village, and when the night did come, and when the whole village were in a complete darkness, he came out from his resort and walked again through the village, playing his pipe, no more mice were in the village to follow him, but the children came from everywhere to join the hero that saved their village today, they followed him while he was walking through the village, the parents came to prevent their children from joining him, but they were too late, the piper led them to a high valley, they passed the valley together and became out of sight, and when the screaming parents came to follow them, they found nothing, the piper and 163 child from the village just disappeared forever! , they didn’t show up again, that’s the real story of what happened in Hamelin in the German countryside  in July 26^th 1284 , no one know where did the piper go, 163 child has gone forever, and that’s what The Grims didn’t tell us, may be they thought that it would be better if we didn’t know the scary part, but ignoring the real story didn’t save the children, and it won’t change the fact that that’s what happened in Hamelin, and of course it won’t answer the near 1000 years question: where did the piper and the children go , yeah , sometimes we prefer not to believe the truth so that we could live in the world we love, and if you don’t believe me, you can imagine the piper’s shadow walking through the village in the darkness, while 163 children are following him to the high valley under the voice of the adults screams, if you can’t imagine so please don’t, because those who read what had been written about this sight in the old books in Hamelin’s library said that it was more terrible than a vampire waking up from his grave in the midnight .

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Let’s talk about Bassant, it was in the summer of 1993, when I was going to that kid’s club, I saw her for the 1^st time, I don’t know what happened to me, it was the 1^st time for me to exam such feel, she was the type of lamina girls , the short hair and the thin glasses, and she was very beautiful, I thought of her all the day and all the night, I was following her in the club wherever she goes, she made my days, for 2 or 3 months the whole world was summarized in one ward : Bassant , and as a kid I supposed that she is the same, she must be think of me all the night, and I convinced myself that she is the one who is following me not the contrary, I lived in a dream, but out from nowhere, Haitham appeared, he was representing everything I hate, the blonde hair, the egoist blue eyes, I think if he lived in Germany he would be now a general in the Nazis forces, I was going crazy every time I see him talking to Bassant, too many fight I picked with him, and I lost every one of them, just because he was older and bigger than me, all this time I was supposing that she is sharing me the same feelings, but that day when I asked her to play with me, and when she responded to me aggressively and left me to Join him to play with his new game, I didn’t know what to do or what to say, I still remember this 19 years ago day like it was yesterday, I went to them, and with my worst attitude I started to hit them, both of them, super punches and super kicks were flowing everywhere, the anger inside me bring me a huge power, even Mark Henry himself wasn’t going to stop me that day, and I didn’t stop until I saw the blood coming from his nose, and for the 1^st time I heard him crying , finally I win the fight, the last fight, and I saw Bassant’s glasses were broken, she was crying too, I got fired from the club, and they called my mother to take me home, they told her that I am banned from being in the club until the summer’s end, and when they suspended me at home 1^st from watching Grindizer, I didn’t care, and when they tried to suspend me from going to the video game centre in the back street , I didn’t care too, and when they start to worry about me when I get into bed with a 40ّ Celsius temperature, I was saying inside : it doesn’t matter people, the little heart is getting broken for the 1^st time , I was asking myself : will I see her again ? , and the answer came 14 years later, in a cold February day in 2007, when I was setting in the street with my friends when a black care came towards us , it stopped and the door was opened, yeah , Bassant’s get down from the car, the same short brown hair, the same thin glasses, the same lamina look in her eyes, she made a bye motion to the guy who was driving the car, and when she looked to me, I knew from the 1^st look that she did remember me, she looked at me for a second, and gone to the stairs, while the guy” her fiancé mostly” moved away , but this time, I didn’t try to pick another fight .

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And if you asked me, I don’t have much to say about Orchid, I still remember her 5^th name, and it was the winter of 1996, the crazy cold winter of 1996, in the same club, while the rain was name of the game, and gray was the official color of the sky, I meet her in the drawing room, I liked the way she was drawing, even in this young age you can’t ignore the talent, I stopped drawing and start to watch her, and then I start to lend her the colors she needs, and when the day was over, we became a friends

And when the school is over, and when I get back to the club, I was really happy to meet her again , I will never forget those funny days, water fights, pillow fights and sand fights , I remember when she led the girls to face us in a football match, lol , I till remember this day when I pulled her from her shirts, and she paid me in return by kicking me with her heels in my knee, I remember the funny moments when we were laughing deep inside from our heart every time we fall in the grass while we were playing, soon the summer is gone, and I will never forget when she hugged me for the last time “ and don’t look at me like that we were 10 years” and asked me if I will join the club next summer, when my parent’s decided that I’ve became too old to join this kid club !! , but I didn’t feel bad because even in this young age I realized that we may know some people to remind us of what we lose , but girls like Orchid just came to stay, that’s why the day she gave me a goodbye hug was the last day I saw her, and I know that I won’t see her again, just because sometimes things would be better to be away so that it would keep her brightness, and until the last moment in my life and before I close my eyes forever I will always remember her , remember her magical smile, and her brown shining eyes, and her long curly hair, and the pinky top I used to make fun of, I will always remember her as a dream came and- in silence-, gone too soon .

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And now let’s say congratulation to my best friend Tarek for having “ I don’t know how” his 1st kid , Kareem , Congratulations, Che Neno and my hottest Condolences to the poor Kareem who is going to be punished by being your son

And in the same page we can say Congratulation for my inspiring Jerminal for having her second kid , Luna, wishing her the best in her upcoming days, and wishing her to stop using Italian names again !

And finally I want to say congratulations for my soul mate for showing the rejection card for the groom number 20, wishing her new greater records to break.

__________________________________________________

 Sometimes, we like to let the doors opened, maybe we afraid from darkness, and in other times we are afraid from being unable to reopen the door once we did close it, so we prefer to let it open even it’s useless, but doors are made to be closed, that’s why even you like it or not , you will close the door sooner or later, so when it’s November 7^th at 5:10 AM , then you know that the door is closed for ever, no matter what, it’s closing forever, so will you be there ? will you take my hand and follow me ?

October 12, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 14 Comments

The Hell-Bound Train ..

It’s not personal, but I swear am going to kill any girl using this perfume, starting of you!!

All of you know that I ‘ve read more than thousand books , in arts , in politics , in psychology , horror novels, sports novels , and in romance too , briefly , I can’t stop myself reading any book

But to be honest , only 9 or 10 books  still in my mind , am talking about the books that really affected me , books I would never ever forget , Utopia , pet cemetery , Love in August (the greatest love story I’ve ever read in my life and Hell bound  Train !!

Hell bound Train, amazing story written by the icon “Robert Bloch” in 1958, won a huge number of awards including the Hugo award.

It talks about the young Martin. One night, after Martin decides he isn’t cut out for a life of petty larceny and contemplates joining the Salvation Army, a large, black, and unmarked train he does not recognize stops near him. The train conductor gets off, bearing a lantern he lights by blowing on it, and offers Martin anything he wants, in return for which he will ride that Hell-Bound Train when he dies. Martin believes he has outsmarted the Conductor by asking for the ability to stop time forever at the moment of his choosing, when he is happiest. The Conductor agrees, and gives him a pocket-watch with which he may stop time by unwinding the watch. (It is never made clear if the Conductor actually is the Devil.)

He fixes up his life, getting a job and subsequent promotions. He meets a woman he would like to marry, and wonders if he should stop time at the moment she accepts him but decides against it because she won’t have sex until marriage. Martin has a son, but decides to wait until he is grown to stop time. By the time this happens, Martin is balding and has a gut, although he is now wealthy. But he again finds happiness, this time in an affair with a younger woman, and again considers stopping time, until his wife discovers the affair; their divorce leaves Martin broke.

He is old by the time he regains his fortune, but decides to travel around the world to look for happiness, but there is no moment in his travels perfect enough to warrant stopping the watch. He tries to make some friends, in order to stop time at a moment of ideal friendship, but it is too late. He has a stroke, and goes to the hospital, but sneaks out to look for his moment, only to have a second stroke just as he decides happiness is freedom. As he lies dying by an embankment, he wonders if he should stop time then so as to save his soul, even if he has to live his dying agony forever. He decides against it and the train returns with the Conductor to take Martin to the “Depot Way down Yonder.”

The Conductor tells Martin that others have tried this wish, but they also never found the perfect moment, always waiting for something better, until they died just like him. Martin laments for a moment but realizes there are others on the Hell-Bound Train, and they are all having their last and greatest time. To the Conductor’s surprise and horror, Martin chooses that moment to stop time, thus rendering the train and all its riders permanently traveling. The story ends with Martin as the new brakeman on That Hell-Bound Train

I read this novel may be 3 years ago , or four , and I still remember every little detail , this story invaded the real mankind soul , when will we get satisfied , the man who had wealth , love , family , and friendship , didn’t find the time deserves to be his “forever moment” .

Is it too complicated? Still us wasting everything time after time month after month year after year, until we finally realize that there is no more time to do anything, discovering that we had all the great things we had wished and we wasted it all over the years?

I still remember it , me in January 2006 , staying in my friend’s cyber , it was 4 am , only both of us still there , the whole place is ours , we was talking to his girl , and me was talking to my girl , smoking , drinking , while Pop Marley insane voice invading the silence , and the light old spice smell covering the whole place , crazy cold weather outside , warm inside , it was the moment , it was the moment that I’d live to live in forever , I felt complete , but unfortunately , the Hell bound Train didn’t show up to me L

Once again , it was 6 am , and it was December 2007, staying at my home , trying to write something for my girl , listening to Behind The Silence amazing song , for Blue System band , watching outside the window , the light rain drops started to get through the 1^st sunrise light in the light red sky at the early hour of the day , I wrote the best of me , I said how do I feel like I’ve never explain before , I wrote what she hadn’t ever read m because she was sleeping!, and my be dreaming of me .

I don’t know what more can I have to stop the time at this moment forever? Hah? But again the Hell bound Train, missed my way.

Anyway , I started to believe that we will never feel the right moment , may be after years I will set and remember this moment , and asked myself again , why didn’t the Gay-Ass Hell bound Train show up .

We will never find the right moment, and once we do, either it will be too late, or we will think that there are a better moments are coming, we will never learn, we will never be happy.

August 25, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 10 Comments

Психологическая война

Contact list is full with the PPV girls now, and it’s so annoying!!

Thank God! She can’t speak English!

It’s amazing how human ego can lead the people! It’s about you would stand burning in hell because you Dn want to jump like the others!! .. Just grow up… nothing faster than life… and nothing worse than regretting in the lose time!!

Me is me… and I’ve my own reasons , and am not grateful to you , or anyone else , all I care about is to be happy , and I’ve no problem with doing every unexpectable thing to be satisfied , and the world can go as a package to the hell !!

You must believe that you are special, but you will be stupid if you think that life will treat you so!

Just like getting flu, a very tiny detail that makes no taste for anything in your life.

And once you do this , your life won’t be the same , this is the step which going to change who are you forever , and am just standing in front of the door , my hands are crossing on my chest , just to avoid this burning desire to knock the door !

And remember, you will do it, and you will like it… don’t ever forget this!

August 21, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 15 Comments

The Moment

July 30th , 2011

Casablanca

5 : 50 pm

Walking beside “3yn zyab” beach… few hours remain before i go back home… Listening to “Can’t give you anything” Thomas Anders’s amazing song.

Well, i don’t know if we bring it, or just at some day. Some moment, at some atmosphere, sunset look, sea golden water at this time of the day, may be all those things make a union to show me the right way to bring all of this out of my mind

Knocking closed doors , kicking my mind’s walls , memories waterfall was running , sinking everything , and once i try to stop myself  , another huge wave comes over to destroy any self-control , I’ve no choice but giving up

Sunset look , fresh air , golden water  and Thomas Anders screaming : “You do something new to me changing my destiny i now know where do i belong” , and feeling sad inside , yeah , i will never forget this moment forever , this is what we call : time stopped to let us pass , but it didn’t stop to set me free , but to showing me his middle finger ..

August 18, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 6 Comments

50 : 50 .. !!

Have you ever been in this situation?

Starting your day in the best way… ending it in the worst one?

It’s usual you know to watch things get worst… but usually after years, months, weeks, days, but not after few hours!!

I knew you from the 1st look, no one needs to look twice to recognize his own hands… people can be too similar in faces, but not in other details… everyone has his own soul… You can look like George Bush, but you can’t be stupid as he is, you can look like Kelly Kelly, but you can’t have the same body.

Anyway being in Cairo is nothing to mention, you can do all what you want, but whatever you are planning to do, just try always to avoid the fatal mistakes:

* Don’t eat in Tahrir square

* Don’t use metro after 6 pm

* Don’t use train number 961

* If you did the third mistake, please don’t use seat number 33

And once you found yourself making all those mistakes in one day , don’t ever come and blame me for what is going to happen to you , cuz u know , it’s always your fault , Dummy !! ..

August 17, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 2 Comments

That Is What They Said .. !!

It’s not my problem, okay?

I’m trying to tell you how do it works, because no more patient and no more sacrifices

You may think of me the way you want, but it’s not about me, it’s about you and every man else even it’s not me, so try for once in your life to understand …

• Shopping is not an activity, and no man will consider it, never!

• Crying is a sort of extortion

• Say what you want to say directly , and let’s make it clear , hidden hints is not working , clear hints are not working , so say what you want to say directly

• Bring me your problem only if you are asking for a solution, that’s what I can do, sympathy is your girlfriend mission, not mine

• 17 months headache is a serious issue, let’s visit a doctor or else stop complaining!

• Anything we’ve said 6 months ago is no longer available to use in any discussion , actually any comment is canceled after 7 days , so don’t come and tell me that in 1920 at 6 o’clock you said ~!@#$% .. How dare you!!

• If you think that you are fat, and then mostly you are, don’t ask me

• If I said something that could be taken on 2 ways, one of them made you mad or sad, and then automatically I meant the other meaning

• You can ask me to do something or tell me the best way to do it, you can’t do both things! “Don’t tell me to carry the sofa and tell me not to carry it like that; you can carry it by yourself!

• If it’s possible, try to say what you want to say anytime but a soccer match

• Me , actually all men can only recognize 16 colors  just like in windows system without a graphic card , peach is not a color , it’s a fruit , and am not going to guess what is Movv or what Is Simon !!

• If I asked you what is your problem, and you said nothing, then I’ll deal with it like there is nothing, I know you are lying but it’s not worth wasting time!

• If you asked a question you are not waiting an answer for, and then expect a reply you might not like

• If we are going somewhere, anything you may wear is okay, really, and you’ve a lot of clothes

That’s what succeeded guys do to make it works , so am not wondering why didn’t it work here , but actually I had to say this , I know I’m going to have my night on the sofa , but no problem , let’s consider it as a kind of … emmmmm … Camp !!

They talk and talk and talk , everybody talks about girls , what did X do and what did R do , blah blah blah  , and I used to hear and thank GOD that you are here , let them talk about all the girls in the world , damn them , they didn’t know my girl . Years passed , things happened , life changed , and so do the people , and finally I learned that all those year they were exactly talking about you , and what a dump who thought that he might have a different girl just because he is he !!

 Just like in the old French joke , Alan sit in the bar and spent hours to talk with Remy about his wife , how beautiful is my wife , how polite is my wife , how honest is my wife, how hot is my wife , you know what , you should see my wife , come on Remy , that’s the way I cross every day to be with my wife , that’s the river that I used to walk with to be with my wife , and that’s the street where my wife lives with me , and that’s the house where my wife lives with me , and there are the stairs i used to go up to be with my wife , and that’s the door where my wife is behind , come on Remy , and that’s the room where we used to have love , and that’s the bed where we used to sleep , and that’s is my wife sleeping like an angel , and here is ME

laying beside her !!!!  … Don’t know why this joke LMAo me!!

 I know that music is life but, did the music made just to make me suffer?

July 28, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 10 Comments

In Love With Casa .. !!

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July 24, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 2 Comments

Just Tell Me ..

1 – Once you are walking in a jungle with your girlfriend, then 2 lions come and attack you, one attacks you. And the other gone for your girl, you only have a single shot in your gun:

A – I’ll shot the lion at my girl so that she might run

B – I’ll shot the lion that attacks me, and go to fight the other lion, she is safe now

C – There are no lion lives in the jungle!!

2 – Two girls asked you to marry both of them!!

A – they are loving each other so much so they want to still together even they lived with one man

B – Emmmmm, no it’s not okay; there is a bisexual smell here!!

C – They are just having fun, so why not: D

3 – You finally get your dream time voyage, it’s your choice

A – A pacific island, welcome Mother Nature

B – USA, dream time won’t be came true without the glowing American dream

C – Thailand, yeah yeah, a bad smile on your face

4 – I tried hard to make you a good person, so why are you trying hard to be cheap?

A – Am not, you’re out of date

B – I’ve always been, it’s your problem that you fooled yourself

C – Am feeling incomplete, I really need this

5 – You are sitting with a girl you just knew 2 days ago. And while you were talking, another guy came to her and says hey to you and her, talk for w a minute, wished you a good day and left:

A – Who is he? Seems like he know you very well, too much, questions like that

B – I knew her just 2 days ago, who I am to ask her now, I would wait may be she tell me

C – “Rated R answers” Mmmm, so do you sleep with him!! “Don’t be annoyed cuz this was exactly the correct answer !!

So, Yeah it seems like you can’t live as a respectful person, being like other CHEAPS is your favorite hobby

July 16, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 3 Comments

Maroc .. Wait For Me .. !!

Are you ready ?

Are you ready ?

Are you ready ?

July 12, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 15 Comments

How Does It Feel

• When you realize that nobody worse than you
• When you know that you are the only one who likes you
• When you know what is right to do, being forced to go wrong
• When you watch this whom you loved like nothing else, in this Rated R clip on the web
• When you see every bad guy around you gets the best of life, while you lived an angel life getting shit
• When you lose the ability to judge people correctly, and who are you to judge them at all
• When you see the naked truth so clear like August’s sun, but still you insist to go on with lies just because you are afraid that your life won’t be the same once you face the truth
• When you use to watch life through a screen, feeling that you will never know how to do what all human beings do
• When you expect others to feel things that you didn’t share, enjoy words you didn’t say, know what do you got inside while you fully closed like an old book in an ancient library
• How does it feel, when you are alone, and you are cold inside

July 10, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 8 Comments

الخطأ الذي صارت له قوة القانون

  من حوالي 8 شهور تقريبا في شهر اكتوبر او نوفمبر اللي فات , كنت راجع من الشغل حوالي   الساعة 12 بالليل لظروف اضطرارية خاصة بالشغل , المهم واحنا في العربية كان معانا واحد من المحااسبين  اللي بيراجعوا معانا اسمه احمد مش فاكر ايه بصراحة , المهم احمد دة شاب اصغر مني بسنة بس من نوعية الشباب اللي انا طول عمري ما كنتش برتاح لهم , اللي هو الشاب الثائر دائما وابدا , اللي في مظاهرات الجامعة تلاقيه , في مظاهرات الشوارع تلاقيه , علي سلالم نقابة المحاميين او الصحفيين تلاقيه , حتي قناة الجزيرة ممكن اوي تسمع صوته في اى مداخلة .

المهم بدأ بينا وقتها حوار ظريف كدة بنسلي بيه الطريق واحنا راجعين .. الكلام دة كان قبل الانتخابات البرلمانية اللي اتعملت في نوفمبر الماضي , بدأنا كلام بدون مقدمات عن السياسة واحوال البلد والحكومة بنت ال*** وحسني مبارك وجمال مبارك وكل الكلام اللي انتم عارفينه دة , وفي وسط كلامه دعاني اني استخدم حقي كمواطن واروح انتخب وسألني لو كنت رحت انتخابات قبل كدة ولا لأ, قلت له اني روحت في 2005 انتخبت ايمن نور انما عمري ما رحت ولا حروح اى انتخابات برلمانية , طبعا رد عليا باني غلطان واني لازم استخدم حقي كمواطن وان الحكومة لما تلاقي المواطنين بقوا واعيين وفاهمين حتعمل حسابهم وحتفكر الف مرة قبل ما تزور الانتخابات وقبل ما تغلي الاسعار وقبل ما تعذب الناس في اقسام الشرطة و .. و … وقبل ما يكمل القصيدة بتاعته دي رجعته بسرعة لأرض الواقع وفهمته ان الطريقة الرومانسية اللي بيتكلم بيها دي تنفع في بلد زي فرنسا او النمسا او سويسرا انما متنفعش في بلد زي مصر .. وان الحكومة بتاعتنا مش فارقة معاها  لو راح الانتخابات 100 شخص او 60 مليون شخص لان كل واحد عارف مكانه من الانتخابات اللي قبلها وان احتمال حدوث اي تأثير لحضور الناس للانتخابات عامل زي احتمال فوز الزمالك بالدوري ومانويل جوزيه بيدرب الاهلي , وقبل ما يحاول يرد او يدافع قلت له ملخص القصة كلها وهي الجملة الاسطورية اللي اختلف الناس مين اللي قالها هل سيمون بوليفار ؟ ولا ماركس ؟ قلت له ” ان تغيير الحاكم الظالم او الطاغية لا يكون الا عن طريق الثورة العنيفة بل والمسلحة ان لزم الامر من قبل الشعب المظلوم علي الحاكم الظالم ”  … يعني من الاخر يا استاذ احمد انت مش حتروح للحاكم الظالم ومعاك علبة جاتوه وتقوله حضرتك كفاية عليك 30 سنة عايزين ناس جديدة , لا انت تروح له ومعاك مضرب البيسبول وتضرب الباب برجلك وتدخل عليه تجيبه من قفاه وترميه برة … هي دي الطريقة الوحيدة للتخلص من الحاكم الطاغية زي ما اكتشفها المرحوم بوليفار محرر امريكا الجنوبية من اكتر من 300 سنة

المهم كان معانا راجل بركة كبير في السن نسيت اسمه , كان راجل صعيدي من المنيا تقريبا وكان هو كبير المجموعة دي , قالنا احنا الاتنين انت عشان تغير لازم تبدأ تغير من تحت , خلي الناس تتغير , خلي الموظفين يراعوا ضميرهم في شغلهم وخلي الناس تبطل رشوة والطلبة تذاكر وتتعلم في كلياتها والعيال يبطلوا ينطوا من فوق السور , والشباب يسيب الكافيه والشيشة ويروح يدور علي شغل .. الي اخر الاسطوانة المعروفة , وقبل ما اقاطعه اسفا متجاوزا كل الاحترام للسن وحسن الاستماع انقذني هو بانه اداني مثل وقالي : تخيل انت عندك بيت كبير وعايز تهده , قمت رادد عليه وقلت له الله ينور علي حضرتك , لو عندك بيت كبير وعايز تهده حتجيب البلدوزر وتضرب من فوق , من اعلي حتة في البيت , مش حتضرب من تحت لانك لو ضربت من تحت البيت حيقع علي دماغك ودماغ اللي ساكنين فيه كمان , المهم طبعا استمر الحوار الثلاثي دة وفي النهاية اعلنت رأيي اللي وضحته لاحمد في بداية كلامي وقلت له من الاخر في بلد زي مصر انا بكرة حكون مواطن عاقل وانفض للانتخابات دي لاني لما اتجاهل المسرحية دي حبقي مواطن عاقل مش مواطن سلبي ولو قررت اشارك فيها بحجة التعبير عن رأيي ابقي مواطن غبي مش مواطن ايجابي .. !!

زي ما قلت الحوار دة حصل في شهر نوفمبر الماضي في عز سيطرة الحزب الوطني علي مقدرات الحياة كلها في مصر وقبل 3 شهور تقريبا من حدوث ثورة 25 يناير , مش عارف ليه امبارح افتكرت الحوار دة وافتكرت مين فينا احنا ال 3 اللي طلع رأيه صح في الاخر , وازاي مبارك مشي بالقوة وغصب عنه مش بالمواجهة السلمية والتعبير عن الرأي , المهم الكلام دة كله جه في راسي علي خلفية الاحداث اللي عادت مرة اخري في ميدان التحرير , وتاهت الحقيقة هل الشرطة غلطانة ومفيش منها فايدة ومش حتتغير ؟ هل الناس دي كانوا فاهمين غلط او مدسوسين وسط اهالي الشهداء ؟ هل لسة للحزب الوطني ديول عمالة تحاول باي طريقة تخلق اي قلق في البلد ؟ محدش عارف !!

من اول ما بدأت ادخن للاسف .. او بمعني ادق من اول ما تحولت من مدخن مواسم ومناسبات الي مدخن رسمي ومحترف في بداية 2006  , وانا بروح للراجل اشتري منه العلبة واقوله علبة روسمينز لو سمحت .. يقوم رادد عليا ويقولي اه روظمان ؟ اقوله اه هات علبة روظمان !! , فضلت كدة مدة طويلة ومكنتش بفوت ابتسامة السخرية عند البياع او اللي قاعد جنبه لما بيسمعوا كلمة روسمينز دي , ولو كان عندي الحاسة السابعة زي يحيي المصري كان زماني سمعته بعد ما مشيت بيقول لصاحبه ههههههه خخخخخخخخخخ روسمينز يا فرفور يا ابن ال **** !!!! , المهم بعد فترة طبعا مش بقيت بس باقوله هات علبة روظمان لا , دة انا بقيت لما بسمع واحد بيقول كلمة روسمينز دي بعمل فيه اللي كان بيتعمل فيا انا قبل كدة وقت ما كنت بنطقها بالطريقة الصحيحة , الموقف دة بيلخص التعبير العبقري اللي قاله العبقري احمد خالد توفيق ” الخطأ الذي صارت له قوة القانون ” والامثلة في حياتنا كتيرة جدا علي التعبير دة ولو عايز تتاكد بنفسك جرب كدة تنطق كلمات زي ثانك يو(شكرا) او ابل (تفاحة) بالطريقة الصحيحة وشوف رد فعل الناس ادامك حيكون ايه !!

طبعا انا ذكرت المثال اللي فوق دة بمناسبة الكلام عن التغيير والناس اللي منتظرة التغيير يحصل , بتكلم طبعا عن التغيير في سلوكيات الناس , تغيير ايه يا اساتذة اللي انتم منتظرينه ؟ تغير ازاي وتغيير ليه وتغيير بأمارة ايه !! تغيير ايه الله يهديكم علي رأي التوانسة !! , عايزين الشرطة تتغير ؟ ليه ؟ وبأمارة ايه ؟ عايزين اللي وصل سنه 40 سنة قضي منها 30 سنة في فرض الاوامر والبطش في خلق الله والافترأء علي الكل يتغير ازاي ؟ عشان عرفتوهم حجمهم الطبيعي ؟ عشان عرفوا قيمتهم الحقيقة ؟ عشان مسحتوا بكرامتهم الارض ؟ عشان خليتم ايام 28 و 29 و 30 يناير هم أأمن 3 ايام في تاريخ مصر ؟ عشان قدرتم تفرضوا الامن والامان في شوارعكم وبيوتكم بعد ما عجزت الشرطة عن فرضه لمدة 30 سنة , غصب عنها في بعض الأحيان وبمزاجها في معظم الاحيان ؟ كام واحد فيكم بأمانة شايف ان كل دي اسباب مقنعة ؟ كام مدخن فيكم يعرف صاحب او قريب او معرفة حتي كان بيدخن ومات من التدخين ؟ هل كل مدخن فيكم بما فيكم انا فكر يبطل تدخين ؟ كام واحد فيكم يعرف قريب او صاحب او واحد في دفعته فضل يحب زميلته في الجامعة 4 او 5 سنين عشان اول ما تتخرج تتجوز اول واحد داخل بيتهم في ايده صينية بسبوسة علي رأي بوحة ؟ هل الناس بطلت او حتبطل تحب ؟ كام واحد زملكاوي فيكم شايف فريقه بيبدأ الموسم ب ( الزمالك راجع وزمالك جديد مع العميد والسنة دي غير كل سنة ) وختم الموسم كالعادة ب (سنظل اوفياء حتي تبتسم لنا السماء و الاهلي خد الدوري بالحكام ويختمها بالبكاء مع عمرو اديب علي ضياع الدوري) ؟ هل الزملكاوية حيبطلوا يشجعوا الزمالك ؟؟  .. لو شايفين ان الحاجات اللي فوق دي ممكن تحصل يبقي فعلا فيه امل ان الشرطة تتغير .

عايزين المواطن العادي سلوكه يتغير ازاي وليه وبأمارة ايه ؟ الثورة اللي انتم فرحانين بيها دي وانا معاكم مكنش ليها اى معني غير لينا احنا بس , الناس اللي عارفة حقوقها وواجبتها وشايفة الناس عايشة ازاي في الدنيا وبتحلم تعيش زيهم ؟ انما بالنسبة لغالبية الشعب المصري , فنصهم لم تعني لهم الثورة سوي مزيد من البلطجة من غير خوف او قلق , ومزيد من المعاكسات والتحرش والاختطاف احيانا بدون خوف من حاجة ؟ دة اللي بيمسكه مرمي في السجن اساسا !! ومزيد من قعدات المزاج والاستطباحات بعد ما بقي الحشيش متوافر اكتر من العيش والجبنة !! اما النص الثاني فالثورة لم تعني له سوي قطع العيش والخراب و ال 5 عيال اللي بيتعلموا وامهم العيانة من ساعة ما اتولدت وامه وامها واخواته والموال الاسود دة اللي كلنا عارفينه , واحد زي دة لو صحي الصبح ولقي ابو الهول سافر امريكا مش حيهتم الا بايه المصلحة اللي حتطلع له من الحوار دة !!

جبتلكم كأبة ويأس واحباط مش كدة ؟ واكيد نصكم بيفكر يعمل لي ديليت اساسا , بس مش دي الحقيقة برضه ولا انا عايش في بلد تانية ؟؟ كلنا عايزين التغيير يحصل انما المشكلة في اننا ازاي نحققه صح , سهل جدا تقنع الغلطان انه يبطل غلط  طالما هو عارف من جواه انه غلطان , انما ازاي تقنع واحد يبطل غلط وهو اتولد وعاش طول عمره علي الغلط ؟ ازاي تقنعه يبطل الغلط وهو اساسا مش شايف انه بيعمل حاجة غلط ؟! هو دة الخطا الذي صارت له قوة القانون علي رأي العبقري احمد خالد توفيق

لو عايزين نتكلم عن الحل , بتسألني عن حل ؟ اسف جدا !! اذا كان جيش بلدك وشرطة بلدك وحكومة بلدك نفسهم مش عارفين يلاقوا حل , جاي تسألني انا ليه يعني ؟ ….. انما لو عايز نصيحتي كصاحب يعني , فالتعليم هو رقم واحد , يعني لما الولد يدخل المدرسة وهو 6 سنين كل اللي بيتعلمه لحد ما يوصل 10 سنين هو دة اللي بيفضل عليه طول عمره , بعد كدة انت حتضطر تعالج مش تعلم , من اول ما يدخل المدرسة متعلموش رحاب تقذف الكرة وياسر يلتقط الكرة , وقطتي صغيرة اسمها شاكيرا , لا علمه هو عبارة عن ايه ؟ وهو موجود في الحياة ليه ؟ خليه يدور علي هدف من بداية حياته , وضح له الطرق اللي تخليه يوصل لهدفه , خليه يعرف ليه لازم يعمل الصح , وليه لازم يبعد عن الغلط , علمه ازاي يبقي بني ادم مؤدب ونظيف ومحترم , ميبقاش انسان سرس ومقزز , علمه ازاي يحترم الناس في الشارع وازاي يحافظ علي الشارع والشبابيك والاشارات والنظافة , علمه الحاجات اللي تخليه يكبر وهو بني ادم , مش الحاجات اللي تخليه يطلع من سنة الي سنة لحد ما يوصل سنه 21 سنة وهو حمار مش عارف اى حاجة في اى حاجة !! ..

دة طبعا بالنسبة للاطفال الصغيرين , اما بالنسبة للناس الكبيرة اللي اتكلمنا عنها فوق واللي عدت السن اللي ممكن يتغيروا فيه , فانا مش شايف لهم حل الا اللي تم تطبيقه في الرواية الاجنبية الشهيرة جدا جدا اللي انا نسيت اسمها للأسف برضه اللي كانت بتحكي عن نيويورك في المستقبل المظلم في صورة شاب منحرف ميعرفش اى شئ عن الحياة الا انه يبدأ يومه بالخمرة والماريجوانا والكوكايين ويقضيه في تكسير المحلات والتحرش بالبنات في الشوارع ويختمه بسباق السيارات مع اصحابه اللي زيه تقريبا في كل حاجة واللي بينتهي كل ليلة بانهم يخطفوا اول بنت يقابلوها وهما راجعين ويغتصبوها في بيت واحد منهم , وبعد ما اتقبض عليه ودخل السجن , وبعد ما ادرك السجان من اللحظة الاولي ان لا يوجد اي عقاب ممكن يردعه , ولا يوجد اي امل في علاجه وتقويم سلوكه , استقر الحل علي تغييره تماما عن طريق منعه من المخدرات والخمور نهائيا وبدون تدريج ( الا القدر اللي يبقيه علي قيد الحياة) وكل ليلة يتم تقييده بالسلسلة في الكرسي ويعرض امامه فيلم جنسي مقزز مع تعريضه (بطل الرواية مش الفيلم طبعا) لعوامل تعذيب اثناء المشاهدة مثل وضع روائح كريهة بجانبه او ضربه او تعذيبه اثناء المشاهدة وهكذا , المهم في الاخر انتهت مدة عقوبته وخرج للمجتمع مرة تانية وهو اقرب لقطة من قطط الشوارع اللي لو قلت لها بخ وانت واقف في القومية حتضرب سبرنت لغاية المحطة في ثانية واحدة , وانتهت الرواية علي موقف له وهو راجع بالليل في شارع ضلمة وقابل بنت ماشية لوحدها في سكته , فما كان منه الا انه بكي بشدة وصرخ وتراجع ادامها وطلع يجري !! .. مبطلش معاكسة ولا اغتصاب لأ دة بقي بيحس بالرعب لما يشوف اي بنت ادامه ويطلع يجري , اتعالج تماما من كل حاجة .

وبالرغم من وحشية العلاج طبعا واللي اكيد كتير حيعترض عليها , الي جانب صعوبة تطبيقها في مصر لاسباب معروفة للكل , الا ان الفكرة اللي عايز اوضحها ان فيه ناس فعلا لا علاج لها سوي البتر , البتر تماما ونهائيا بأي وسيلة وكل وسيلة ممكنة … في راوية يوتوبيا الرائعة للعبقري احمد خالد توفيق واللي صدرت في عام 2008 وبتحكي عن رؤيته لمصر ومستقبلها في سنة 2020 ( اللي مقرأش الرواية دي فاته نص عمره ) ذكر قبل نهاية الرواية انه بيخيل له ان كل الكذابين والمنافقين والمنحرفين والجهلة وعديمي الاحترام وعديمي الذكاء وعديمي الهمة والكسولين والمتواكلين والاوغاد كلهم قد اتخذوا مصر موطنا دائما وابديا لهم , وبالرغم من قسوة الجملة والتعبير الا انك لو فكرت كويس فيها حتلاقي انه محق بنسبة 100% وبص حواليك , من اول ما تنزل من بيتك , للبواب اللي عايز دايما فلوس لاي سبب وخلاص , لسواق التاكسي اللي بتركبه واللي عايز يطلع منك مصلحة بأي طريقة , للساعي اللي في الشغل اللي بيقولك كل سنة وانت طيب 365 يوم في السنة وطبعا انت مش عارف ايه المناسبة بس المهم انك مادام كل سنة وانت طيب يبقي لازم تهرش علي رأي المرحوم نجاح الموجي , حتي في الشارع تبص حواليك تلاقي اللي ماشي بالمطواة يجرح في العربيات من غير سبب واللي واقف ماسك ازازة قديمة ومستني اي عربية تعدي عشان يرميها تحت عجلاتها , للي واقف يعاكس ( لو كنتي بنت ) حتي لو كان راكب علي عربية كارو او عجلة قديمة معلق علي ضهرها انبوبتين من غير ما يفكر ثانية ان فرصته لا تصل حتي الي 1 % !!  , حتي من اسبوعين تقريبا وانا نازل اشتري تذاكر ماتش الاهلي والاسماعيلي من القاهرة واحنا جوة المترو دخلت علينا واحدة منقبة شايلة عيل علي كتفها وماسكة كمية ورق مطبوع في حجم الكراسة العادية , ولما فتحت اقرا الورقة لقيت القصة التقليدية جوزي اصيب في العمل اصابة اقعدته وعندي 5 عيال بيتعلموا وامي عيانة وابويا ميت من سنتين وصاحب البيت بيهددني بالطرد عشان مش بدفع الايجار .. الخ .. الخ , طبعا ربنا يرزقها ويغنيها لو كانت محتاجة ويسامحني لو كنت ظلمتها , بس لما بصيت للورقة لقيتها مطبوعة باحسن جودة ممكنة علي انضف ورق ممكن ومعمول لها اطار وزخارف وكمية الورق اللي معاها كبيرة جدا تكاد تصل لالف ورقة , سألت نفسي انا وصاحبي اللي كان معايا هو مش فلوس طباعة الورق دي كانت ممكن تأكلها هي وعيالها وجوزها لمدة شهرين ع الاقل !! , طبعا محدش يقولي ان واحد فاعل خير طبعها لها عشان تلف بيها لانه لو فاعل خير كان ادها فلوس اسهل ووفر عليها المرمطة في المترو , وحتي لو صاحب مطبعة اعتقد انه لو حيطبع لواحدة الف ورقة عشان تلف بيهم تنتظر حسنة مكنش عمره حيوصل لنوع وجودة الورق والطباعة دي اساسا !!!

المهم عشان منخرجش كتير برة الموضوع , ومن الاخر عشان انا في الشغل وايدي فعلا وجعتني من الكتابة , اظننا اتفقنا علي الحل بالنسبة للصغار وبالنسبة للكبار , والمعترض اقوله العقاب الحاسم والفوري اللي بتظهر نتيجته حتي لو لم يطل الجميع فهو علي الاقل حيكون كافي وعبرة حقيقة للي لم يطله العقاب هذه المرة .

الثورة قامت عنيفة من اول يوم , مشينا حسني مبارك بالقوة , وقهرنا الشرطة بالقوة , ومسكنا البلطجية ايام 28 و 29 يناير بالقوة , وكذلك مصر مش حتنضف ولا تتغير الا بالقوة , لان فعلا فيه ناس عايشين زي الحيوانات جوة البلد ملهمش هم الا الكيف والمتعة والحصول علي الفلوس بدون اى مجهود , واذا كانت الناس دي مش ذنبها انهم ضحايا لنظام غبي اضاع معالم واخلاق البلد في 30 سنة , فاحنا كمان مش ذنبنا نتحمل اللي بيعملوه بعد ما قررنا ننضف البلد , جايز اللي يتعاقب منهم عقاب حقيقي يبقي عبرة فعلا للي زيه ولسة متعاقبش , حتي ولو من دافع الخوف .

نضفوا مصر بقي

Maher …

July 3, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | Leave a comment

21056

Yeah ..

Fe3lan shy2 gamyl w mory7 bgd enk te2zy bny adam 😀

June 21, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | Leave a comment

After 10 Long Years ..

So i supposed to be happy

I should feel my heart dancing

And no way can I sleep, yes i must feel happy

Memories, good memories that bring you this feel in your stomach, make you feel you are flying to the moan

Yeah, all of this is great

BUT

Why don’t i feel anything but that pain in my heart?

I mean for example i used to be happy when i get a plastic ball when i was kid , of course i won’t feel the same if i get it now !!

And the idea of that both of us are no more the same, is killing me…

Anyway it’s all about some hours and we will see

But from now, and before anything starts, i feel that something bad is going to happen

Am just afraid

June 10, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | Leave a comment

Dream 3

And when i crossed the ocean

And when i spent a life time in the darkness trying to reach a light

And when it seems i found something

And when i was near to be broken, losing every hope

She just came to me from nowhere to make my life

And when she touched me there i realized that there is something going to be unforgettable

May 28, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 2 Comments

Happy Birthday, Dalia

It’s not just she used to be the 1st person to wish me a happy birthday

And it’s not a try to be kind in return

But really , to the cute naughty girl

To the best friend i’ve and i’ll ever get

Happy birthday  and a better year is waiting for you

sorry i was hungry and the cake seems amazing 😦

May 28, 2011 | Categories: Ninety Four | 8 Comments